Eric Mangini, Day 7.
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David Bowie followed Nick Swisher on Twitter. Honest. This is one more reason to thank them both for having existed (and Swisher for continuing to do so).
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The seeming solution to the Pittsburgh-Cincinnati roller derby brawl is nailgunning the coaches to chairs and not allowing them to approach the field.
I mention this only because I want to see a guy try to convince Joey Porter not to go wherever he decides he wants to go.
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And while we’re at it, Vontaze Burfict got one fewer game in suspension time than players get for illegal substance busts, which is if nothing else is consistent with NFL policy that heads matter less than other innards, be they pulmonary, cardiovascular or musculo-skeletal.
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The only way the NFL owners can do the right thing in Houston Tuesday is to delay the Los Angeles vote due to a lack of consensus on any of the plans, which would hopefully cause angry citizens of Inglewood and Carson to go to their city councils and have the stadium land parcels condemned. Now who can’t support that?
[BAIR: Davis, Spanos bond with Chargers-Rams union gaining steam]
I mean, doesn’t someone have to rise up just once before we all die and tell these 32 weasels they don’t get whatever they want just because they said they want it? No? Not on anyone’s docket? Okay, screw it. Do what you want, corporate overlords. We are only here to serve you.
[BAIR: Raiders players curious about LA relocation prospects]
You slugs.
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After Dave Rice quit as UNLV basketball coach over the weekend, the assumption among some inside the program was that longtime Runnin’ Rebel and assistant coach Stacey Augmon would get the gig. But then the words “Todd” and “Simon” were spoken, and Augmon’s wife Leslye expressed an opinion on Twitter:
“Stacey is getting -----d just like the last time he was here,” she demurred. “Todd Simon really? ?????? I am done #RebelFamily NOT”
Then she expressed another:
“Yes I had to delete the tweet. I am ride or die for my husband like he was for this University. Nuff Said.”
Then she expressed a third to a supporter:
“I will continue to support #My Rebel Sons I have been silent a long time.”
Happy times ahead, then, because there’s no chance whatsoever this ends badly.
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Hue Jackson may end up coaching four teams simultaneously next year, but I do like reminding the audience that Doug Marrone quit the Buffalo Bills sure that he would be hired by the New York Jets, and ended up with neither job.
In the meantime, nobody has mentioned Jim Tomsula for a vacancy, though I suspect it’s because he shaved his mustache and nobody knows where he is any more. Stealth, thy name is Jimmy T.
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[MAIOCCO: NFL head-coaching tracker]
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I don’t know what the fuss is about the geographically bastardized Super Bowl poster. I keep thinking it’s accurate, and that the game is actually being played somewhere else.
Like Halifax.
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Speaking of a place the Super Bowl should go, Ryan Whitney, the megaveteran NHL player just finished a turn in the KHL at Sochi and explained it for The Players’ Tribune. But the key pull is not about Russia, but about the player’s real fear – not being able to hang around.
“Playing in the NHL is a fantasy world. It’s a dream come true, but unfortunately you get comfortable there, and take it for granted. I’m sure not everyone does that, but I did. I’ll always regret that.
“You love it and you hate it. The grind becomes mind-numbing. Everybody bitches. Even the superstars. Even the guys who you think eat and breathe hockey, they bitch. Some of the best times you have are sitting around a locker room, complaining with the boys.
“Why? It’s like Stockholm syndrome. The stuff that sucks is the stuff that you bond over with the guys in the trenches with you. Then one day, you wake up, and you’re old, and it’s over. You don’t have anything to bitch about anymore. You just have some coffee, go on Twitter, go about your day. It’s brutal.”
Yay bitching!
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And then there’s Yay Bitching! A, Palermo, long Italy’s weirdest team, went double-wide on the double-weird over the weekend.
Head coach Davide Ballardini got into an argument about professionalism with his captain, goalkeeper Stefano Sorrentino before Sunday’s match at Hellas Verona, and decided not to speak to any of his other players during the game, which Palermo won.
Then again, Palermo has fired two managers after wins this year, so maybe president Maurizio Zamparini is just a whack-job. Ballardini was hired to replace Giuseppe Iachini, then was fired after seven games and replaced by Iachini, who then was re-dismissed for asking for roster help and re-replaced by Ballardini.
“I don’t know if the coach will be sacked,” Sorrentino said, “but I just want to say that if he is then we are in history because it’ll be the second time this season our tactician has been fired after a victory.”
Yay bitching, re-bitching, and re-re-bitching! It's the international language of love.