Already the Los Angeles Clippers cannot agree on the thing that should unite them all – loathing the Golden State Warriors. From the Los Angeles Times’ Ben Bolch (@latbbolch): “Doc Rivers on tiff with GS: ‘I’m surprised how sensitive they are about it. They are the champions, so they should just be the champions.’”
And then from the Orange County Register’s Dan Woike (@DanWoikeSports): “’We don’t have any more hatred for them than anybody else’ - DeAndre Jordan on the Warriors.”
It’s October, gents. How’s about we work on getting our stories straight?
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[RELATED: Warriors, Clippers trade Twitter 'shots' ahead of preseason game]
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Because you have a rich leisure life and a deficient actual one, Star wars baseball.
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News
And now real baseball, where congratulations go to longtime baseball writer Hal McCoy of the Dayton Daily News has regained an old ocular friend (his left eye) and is using it to become an exciting new pain in the butt to his family and friends. McCoy is actually not a terrible human, so this is good.
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A good night in Canada, which is rare when there are no hockey games involving the Canadiens, Canucks, Flames, Jets, Maple Leafs, Oilers or Senators. For one, they held an election in which a new government has been assembled, which is always exciting no matter who wins (I’m obliged to pretend not to have a rooting interest, plus I’m not a Canadian, plus our own political system is such a massive vat of warm cat-sick). For two, the Blue Jays kicked metric tons of Kansas City buttocks, giving us at least two tweets of note. One, from news photographer Kat Arnett – “Canadian news networks are interrupting election results to update viewers with the score of the Jays game. Take that, CNN!” – and the other, from noted hockey writer Adam Proteau – “Bye, Stephen (Harper, outgoing prime minister). Real shame you Cueto'd. Nice hair, though.”
This is important not because of the outcome, or even because of Harper’s hair, but because it is part of the new cool thing for kids – using surnames as verbs.
[RELATED: Donaldson, Blue Jays bust out, hold off Royals in Game 3 of ALCS]
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A’s pitchers Pat Venditte has been picked up by the Toronto Blue Jays, although not in time for them to help the Jays in the postseason. But he’ll be as good as any they the Jays have ever had.
[RELATED: A's pitchers Venditte, Martin claimed off waivers]
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Former Manchester United players (and now mini-oligarchs) Gary Neville and Ryan Giggs bought and are renovating the former Stock Exchange building in Manchester into a luxury hotel. Problem: About 30 homeless squatters, who were kicked out of an empty office building last week.
Solution: The landlords meet with a local human rights advocate and decide that the homeless folks can stay through the winter as long as they, in Neville’s words, “look after the building and respect the actual building.”
So no gobbing, two-footed tackles or yelling about referee Mark Clattenberg, and definitely no calling Man U manager Louis Van Gaal The Crackpot Quail, even though they are dead ringers: http://bit.ly/1jy3tV4(courtesy The Independent) and http://bit.ly/1LHyAYo(courtesy Tex Avery).
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And finally, POMPINSTANCE! (courtesy Jim Tomsula).