
Arizona Cardinals coach Bruce Arians has taken a very traditional approach to what he believes is the greatest threat to the business he has devoted his life to – and it’s not as simple as saying, “He’s blaming the women.”
It is, however, as simple as saying, “When you have a lousy message, go after the messenger.”
The man who called parents who discourage their kids from playing football “fools” told the audience at the Cardinals’ high school football coaches clinic Friday that the game is being attacked by, well, those insidious mothers.
“We feel like this is our sport. It's being attacked, and we got to stop it at the grass roots,” he said, applying his years of marketing and political expertise to a medical problem exacerbated by the dishonesties of his superiors. “It's the best game that's ever been f---in’ invented, and we got to make sure that moms get the message because that's who's afraid of our game right now. It's not dads, it's moms.”
He also claimed that the key to winning over those insidious maternal parents is, well, better tackling.
“Our job is to make sure the game is safe at all levels,” Arians told the true believers. “The head really has no business being in the game. There’s a lot of different teachers, but when I was taught how to tackle and block, it was on a two-man sled and you did it with your shoulder pads. That’s still the best way to do it. There's really isn't any place for your face in the game. I would beg all of you to continue to learn more about what they're now calling rugby style tackling.”
In fairness, he tried to clarify what he said Sunday with this:
“Just to [be] clear about kids playing football, my point is that moms are often the ones making those decisions in a family. We have to make sure that they're getting the message about everything being done to make the game as safe as possible. They're the ones we have to influence. It's a great game and it's even greater when it's played, coached and taught the right way. Everybody involved with the sport has a responsibility to make that happen.”
It’s still the same problem, though. Arians claims the messenger needs to be given the correct message, whether that message is or is not factual, and the truth is Arians doesn’t know how much damage his game causes any more than anyone else in the business does.
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Of course, one also wonders whether there are moms out there pointing at Jordan Spieth and saying, “See what he just did? See how he had to give his clothes to that Willett boy? That’s why you’re never playing golf.”
Actually, there aren’t, because while golf may not give you brain damage, it isn’t at the heart of how the sport is played. See, Bruce, that’s the difference, and that’s why you’re going to have a hell of a time telling them you didn’t mean it the way it came out.
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This is just too weird to explain, except to provide the link and tell you a soccer match in Saudi Arabia was interrupted while one of the goalkeepers was forced by law to endure a haircut.
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And finally, this hasn’t come up in a while, but here’s why no U.S. league is planning an expansion to Cuba any time soon.
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